Mexican Holiday So I was lucky enough to go on Mexican Holiday with 3 of my very favorite gays for the week of Mon. Sept 12 through Fri. 16. We went to Playa Del Carmen, which is on the Caribbean side of Mexico, about an hour from Cancun, and also near Cozumel. We booked our trip through Expedia.com, and we had no idea what to expect. It looked nice on-line, but you just never know. We could not have been happier or more impressed with everything. We stayed at an all-Inclusive Resort on the beach which included: a 24 hour snack bar (with beer, wine, champagne and liquor also 24 hours); an ample and impressive buffet for breakfast, lunch, and dinner; stocked minibar in our rooms; one Room Service order per day; and one reservation allowed in the resort’s fine dining restaurants per day. There was even a snack bar open all day on the beach; and a bar on the beach, as well as bars with wait staff service at both pools. We had everything we could possibly want available to us at no additional cost! We were so happy with the Resort we stayed at, part of the Real Resorts chain. This one was called The Gran Porto Real Resort. The food and the service were excellent. They even had housekeeping that didn’t wake you and cleaned the room at 3 in the afternoon, or whenever it was that you managed to leave the room. This was, hands down, the best Mexican vacation I have ever had. Now on to the actual vacation! www.realresorts.com We arrived in Cancun (the nearest airport) on Monday at 11am after flying and transferring in Houston and being up all night. It was actually raining when we arrived, and it did not look very promising that it would clear up anytime soon. Surprisingly, it didn’t dampen our moods. We got beers, hopped on a shuttle to our hotel, and began chatting with other tourists. My friend, Jason el Diablo, and I arrived at our hotel to find that our friends from LA had managed to beat us there, and were already in their beachwear. We got to our room, a Jr. Suite with balcony, and were positively giddy. It didn’t hurt that there were 2 beers in the fridge just waiting for our arrival! We couldn’t believe how nice it was. The rain even cleared up quickly. We changed into swimwear and immediately went exploring. It was in the 90s, very hot and humid, and we spent our first day on the beach and at the pools. We met a lot of people and ended up having tequila shots with them. The first night I crashed before midnight, since I never slept the night before, but my friends from LA hit the clubs, had a blast, and abruptly woke us around 2 am jumping on my bed and screaming, giving me an unwelcome massage, and knocking things over loudly. I was really pissed off by the abrupt awakening, but they went to their room after I yelled at them that I didn’t come on vacation to have to wake up when I wanted to sleep! We spent every day at the pools and on the beach. Walking along the beach behind our hotel, there were numerous other hotels and bars where people were hanging out. One hangout spot had beds on the beach, and a DJ playing ambient trance. The water was beautiful, clear aquamarine blue; and even at sun down, you could go neck-deep into the water, look down and see everything underwater clearly. The water was warm and perfect. I bet the snorkeling is amazing, although I didn’t do it on this trip. We had a few sprinkled showers throughout the week, but they came and went quickly, never tainting our holiday. There were beautiful people everywhere, as well as the occasional fat guy in thong! The beaches were mostly populated with Europeans and locals, which I found very pleasant. One night we decided to go on the Captain Hook’s Pirate Cruise; a 3-hour cruise on an old-style Pirate Boat with Open Bar, and choice of either Lobster or Steak Dinner. The entire crew dresses as Pirates, and they have sword fights and the like. I did this a few years ago and had the best time, so we couldn’t resist doing it again. We had a blast, but it was really cheesy. I had a mild interruption in the fun though. At the beginning of the cruise, a bee landed on my face, which was terrifying! After remaining calm in hopes that it would fly away, it did, but then it returned! The second time, it tried to crawl in my nose and mouth and ear and it wouldn’t leave! I lost my cool and finally panicked, and showed my friend Jason. We were both freaked and started waving our arms around swatting at it, and of course it stung me in the chin. It totally freaked me out! I was fine after I calmed down though, and my friend Andrew was nice enough to pull the stinger out as well as talk me out of the panic! Thank God I am not allergic to bees! This was my first time being stung, and I hope it will be the last. After recovering from the shock of being stung, we pigged out and drank like alcoholics, and ended up in a conga line. I flatly refused to participate in any silly drinking games or in doing the Macarena though! The fact that I was with 3 guys tended to confuse a lot of men, and I was asked repeatedly throughout the trip if someone was my boyfriend or husband, if I was on my honeymoon, or if one of them was my brother. My friend Andrew further confused one of the pirates by saying, "Nope, she’s my mom!" He thought this was so funny, that I ended up telling others later that he was my son! (Never mind that he is technically older than me!) By night, we would hit 5th Avenue, where there were shops, restaurants, bars and clubs. We found the Gay Club, Playa 69, which had the worst DJ music I have ever heard. It was hilarious. My friend Andrew and I couldn’t resist the urge to dance to Barry Manilow’s Copa Cabana Gay Dance Mix among others! It was just too funny. A local said to me, "You’re very lucky." And I said, "Why?" And he said, "Because your friends are all very good looking." I thought that was funny since they are all gay, how the hell does that make me lucky exactly?! (Okay, I AM lucky, but that isn’t why!) I found 2 clubs that were my favorites in Playa. The first was a bar called Fly, which was attached to a hotel whose name I never bothered to obtain. Fly was a Rooftop bar of modern minimalist décor, with beds and a Pool and Hot Tub, overlooking a wall that old films were projected on at night, and an ambient trance DJ. It was lovely. The bartender at Fly recommended I go to this other place which ended up being my other favorite nightspot in Playa, called Santenera. It was a bi-level nightclub. The first floor was dance music, air-conditioned room with burgundy velvet padded walls, scented candles filling the room with a gorgeous scent, a giant Marlin on the wall, and a large bar in the center of the room. The upstairs was a rooftop bar and lounge with different DJ music. The rooftop had a very Cuban cabana-like feel with cushions, plants, and the most beautiful men and women I have ever laid my eyes on. My friend and I were calling it the "model bar." The bartender from Fly (who was also nice looking) came over after work and grabbed me and stuck his tongue down my throat! I was not not at all expecting it, nor did I want it. Earlier he had mentioned his girlfriend to my friend and I! It was totally funny though; that he thought it was acceptable behavior. He apologized profusely, and again the following night, but he never even gave me a drink! What bad manners! The last night we were there, Thursday Sept. 15th was Mexican Independence Day. We ended up at Fly’s roof for a while watching some of the best fireworks I have seen. There were parties on all the streets with Mariachis and dancers, music and drinks. It was a lot of fun. I ended up back at Santenera again and it was totally packed for the special night’s celebration. I went with locals who owned a bar and we were VIP all the way, being whisked through the velvet rope and leaving a long line waiting behind us. We drank into the night and I finally thought to ask the time. It was 5:20 am, and I was checking out and leaving the following day by noon, so I decided I had better get back to the hotel. When I left the club, there had to still be about 400 people there and the party was in serious full swing. I could have stayed till dawn. Hell, I could have stayed in Playa Del Carmen forever. I just loved it and hope to go back again soon. I highly recommend the Real Resort Chain to anyone looking to vacation in Mexico, as well as Playa Del Carmen as a lovely, fun place to visit. (I have been to Puerto Vallarta, Cancun, Acuna, and Rosarita, and Playa was my favorite Mexican vacation spot. I plan to check out Cozumel someday as well.)